How should you mark a milestone or celebrate a new season of life?

When not every milestone is publicly marked in a woman's life {+ more favorite book recommendations and a new recipe!}

You're wondering how such a momentous life-change could "sneak up" on me. 

That's okay; I'm wondering that, too.

Yet there it is, after twenty-five years of homeschooling, I'm "suddenly" done, and that season of life is behind me. 

And to say this event feels strange is an understatement. Feels happy, sad, and a relief all at the same time. 

After pouring myself into this endeavor for decades, we are celebrating our youngest son's graduation from high school. 

He did it!

And we did it. 

So we're stopping to note this turning point, everyone gathering to applaud his achievement.

And I'm so proud and excited for his next steps!

Not All Milestones Are Marked

But privately, ever-so-privately, in the quiet part of my heart, I consider how there's no graduation party thrown for the woman behind the scenes.

Now, please don't misunderstand me or "hear" an underlying tone that isn't there. I am thrilled about this accomplishment in his life - and as this is our eighth child - in all their lives. 

I'm just saying that not every milestone is publicly marked in a woman's life. 

And I wouldn't be surprised if you know just what I mean.

Maybe you're a mom who is only now realizing you're past the toddler stage, and you've both grown in the process. Or perhaps you just came through some tough teenage years . . . and came out on the other side. 

You might be a grandmother who looks for a thousand tiny ways to help your adult children and love on your grandchildren. You might also be looking after your aging parents without them, or really anyone, realizing the cost to you. 

Or you're single, and you've served faithfully in your church or extended family. No one is throwing you a graduation or retirement party, but you've been so sacrificial…for many years now. 

Yes, how about you, my silent, new-season-of-life friend?

*Helping Hakon learn to read with Cowboy Sam books

*Homeschooling the “little boys”

Happy 18th birthday and high school graduation!!

How to Celebrate a New Season of Life

So, for those of you who are smiling in recognition, but even more for those who are tearing up as you read this, I have some thoughts for you to consider. 

First, it's true: our efforts and sacrifices often remain unseen and uncelebrated. But none of it is lost or forgotten by your Heavenly Father. He knows what you've been through and the many ways you've sacrificed for those you love. 

Secondly, I hope you won't merely move on to the next thing when a particular stage or season is done. Trust me, there's always a "next thing," and if you're not intentional about marking and remembering it, your life will become a blur. 

Thirdly, sometimes be content to celebrate your season/event/accomplishment softly and privately. This may sound counterculture as it seems that if it doesn't have bright lights and a loud bang, then it doesn't count. I disagree. Some of my sweetest celebrations have been with only my husband or maybe a close friend. 

Or, yes, at times, alone. Just me before the Lord acknowledging what He's given me or enabled me to do. Maybe I’ll record it in my journal so that one of my grown children might come across it someday and join me (perhaps years later) in my personal celebration. 

Lastly, be willing to invite a few  - or maybe bunches of - trusted, special people in your life to help you celebrate. Does the very idea make you squirm? It doesn't have to be that way. 

We have dear friends who invite a dozen of their closest friends to help them celebrate their milestone anniversaries. Not a cruise or dining at an expensive restaurant. Instead, long-time friends gathered around their dinner table to laugh, reminisce, and remember what the Lord had brought them through. I love this. 

And to my single friends (and you know who you are), why not throw one of your lovely tea parties and invite those who love you and understand what you've been through this past year? Take an afternoon to pause and remember the hardships, sweet moments, and God's faithfulness. 

So now, as I write this, I can see that I'd better put something together to commemorate my own "graduation" from homeschooling after all these years. I am still trying to figure out what I should do, so if you have any suggestions, please pass them on in the comments below!

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. ~ Ephesians 2:10

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Favorite Resources and Recommendations

On My Book Stack: 

Something New:

Finding a book that corresponds with the current topic might not always work out, but it did this time. Nicole Zasowski wrote this terrific book a couple of years ago, and I found it so timely: What If It's Wonderful?: Release Your Fears, Choose Joy, and Find the Courage to Celebrate. I appreciated her approach, and without downplaying the hard things, she encourages and helps you choose celebration.

I will also mention another Sara Hagerty book, Unseen: The Gift of Being Hidden in a World That Loves to Be Noticed. This is a beautiful book that encourages you in all those many unseen moments and ministry in your life.

God is inviting us to embrace this kind of hiddeness: When no one else applauds you, when life is hard and makes no sense or simply feels like drudgery in the still quiet, will you hide yourself in Me? ~ Sara Hagerty

Something Old: 

This one takes me back to my childhood, and while I enjoyed it back then, I'm an even bigger fan now. After watching the series All Creatures Great and Small (*ahem, three times and counting), I started listening to the original book on Audible, read by the leading actor, Nicholas Ralph, and it is such a delight! His accent(s) are simply fabulous. And such a fun, wholesome story! ¹

In Our Kitchen: 

So, the good news? Our chickens love the warmer weather and are laying very well. Also, our family eats a lot of eggs. Like, a lot, a lot. It's a match made in heaven. However, you can only eat so many fried or scrambled eggs before you start feeling gaggy (in my personal experience).

So, I've been working on making deviled eggs—literally the perfect lunch or snack. I've always been intimidated by this one, but now I've found a recipe and a technique that's changed everything. 

First, here's the recipe – it's easy-peasy, and I appreciate the addition of dill pickles. 

Secondly, I'm one of those people who use their InstantPot nearly every day. So to discover you can make "perfect" hard-boiled eggs in 10 minutes? Fantastic! (and the recipe covers other methods, too). 

So try it and see what you think? And if you have any other tips or tricks, let me know in the comments! 

Hospitality In Our Home:

As it happened, our youngest son not only graduated but turned 18 the day after his last final exam! So we celebrated by throwing a big barbecue with his siblings, close friends, and ultimate frisbee team members. 

One of the challenges was that it was a mixed crowd, which meant that not everyone knew everyone else. This can be an awkward situation for many. So what is the solution? 

Here are some suggestions when you have a gathering of people who aren't acquainted with everyone: 

1. As people come through the door, be sure to introduce them to at least one other person at the party. 

2. Tap someone ahead of time to "look after" a newcomer. I asked a kind family friend if she would befriend a young girl who would be at the party and new to our area. She was more than happy to oblige!

3. Just break the ice. Go around the room and have each person say how they know the birthday boy (the guest of honor, etc.). As a classic introvert, trust me, this just about kills me. But even I must admit that everyone always feels much better once we've all met!

*Bonus: Another benefit of throwing an event with a "mixed crowd” is that it also gives other people a chance to make new friends. It’s a win-win!

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A Closing Blessing

I pray you will feel God's pleasure as you faithfully serve your people.

May you remember to celebrate others, even as you desire to be celebrated and remembered.

I hope you pause today to consider how you might celebrate a new season or recent victory. To drink it in. To give God the glory. 

In His grace,

Lisa Jacobson

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1. You’ll find that I’ll recommend secular books as well as Christian ones. I will try to include a “parental advisory,” such as mentions of alcohol and romance (both the case here). However, as always, it will be up to you to discern whether this book is a good fit for you.