A little beauty advice while embracing the gift of growing older

And a true story about a mysterious stranger who reminds us what beautiful means.

I didn't even notice him at first.

A small crowd of us was waiting to put in our order at Junction Coffee. And we resembled more of an amoeba than a line. On one side, a group of young people laughing and pushing each other, while on the other, a coffee klatch of silver-haired women catching up on old times.

So you can see why, amid the noisy chattering and rich smell of roasted coffee beans, I wasn't aware of the quiet elderly gentleman standing only a few feet away from me.

He wasn't exactly staring, but I could feel his gaze. After some time, I felt obliged to look back and extend a friendly smile. At this point, he removed his cap, wiped his head, and asked, "Do you mind if I offer you a compliment?"

And for a second, I thought perhaps we knew each other. But I soon realized no, it's just that he reminded me so much of Matt's dad with his kind eyes and charming ways.

He seemed safe enough, and so I smiled again.

Then he quickly added, "But I'm not hitting on you or anything. It's just a genuine compliment."

And that made me laugh.

Friends, I’m in my late 50’s. In my world, men open the doors for me or politely let me cut to the front of the grocery line. But they don't hit on me.

And so I waited to hear what he had to say.

Touched by Unexpected Kindness

After fumbling around for a sentence or two, he finally offered, "I'm not saying you look attractive, I'm just saying there's something refreshing about you."

And because it was still unclear whether this was a compliment, he clarified, "Something emanates from you…a kind of goodness. Something wholesome."

His words, though simple, touched me deeply. They made me feel not exactly “attractive” (his word) but beautiful all the same. And I told him how much his thoughtful comment brightened my day.

Then he gestured for me to step up to the front of the line (see, I told you this always happens to me!), but I declined, explaining that I was waiting to meet a girlfriend.

Ten minutes later, my young friend joined me, and I went over to place our order. Yet when I went to pay, the cashier informed me that the gentleman had already paid for my drink as well as my friend's.

And once again, I was moved by his kindness.

So I grabbed our drinks and walked across the room to thank the generous man, but he was nowhere to be found. It was the strangest thing to lose someone in such a small café. My new gentleman friend had mysteriously disappeared.

And I've been thinking about that sweet exchange ever since.

*Matt’s parents (now at Home with their Savior). Can you see what I mean about my father-in-law’s eyes and smile?

*The wise and lovely Jodie Berndt and Susan Yates.

Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

~ Proverbs 31:30

What Makes a Woman Beautiful

Naturally, I am grateful for the gentleman's compliment.

But what strikes me is how it had very little to do with the outside and almost entirely about what he was sensing on the inside. His encouragement had nothing to do with trendy fashion, silky hair, glowing skin, or toned arms. Far from it. At least in my case. (And I’m not being humble here, simply honest).

Yet, in this world, we're constantly bombarded with 'beauty tips and tricks.' The push is for miracle creams, anti-aging supplements, and skincare devices as if the ultimate compliment is to hear, 'How good you look for your age,' 'How smooth your skin is,' or 'How much weight you've lost.' But this isn't beauty; it's a mere illusion, a mirage that distracts us from the true essence of beauty.

I fear we've traded the beauty of aging gracefully for a desperate grasp of disappearing youthfulness and, frankly, finding it rather empty.

Because when I think of the women I consider beautiful? Truly beautiful? It's not their faces or figures that come to mind but their loving hearts and zest for life. These are people like Corrie Ten Boom, Elisabeth Elliot, Jodie Berndt, and Susan Yates—all women who have significantly impacted my life.

You can see it too, can’t you? When you look at them, you're naturally drawn to their bright smiles, the warmth in their eyes, and their gracious demeanor. These are the qualities that define real beauty.

And what’s really lovely is that these qualities are within reach of every one of us.

A few beauty secrets I've picked up from the women I admire

Maybe this doesn't feel possible based on how you've been feeling lately (especially if judging by the world's measurement). But I’ll let you in on some of the best beauty secrets:

• Loving your friends and family well.

• Caring about strangers and those in need.

• Cultivating a grateful heart (nothing is more drop-dead gorgeous than a thankful woman).

• Committing to always growing and learning.

• Becoming a woman of prayer.

• Drawing near to God.

And please believe me because these are not merely empty words. Pursuing such things will give you that 'certain glow' that no skin cream or fitness routine can come close to replicating. It’s a fact.

There is no shortcut to true beauty, but a life well lived — loving God and serving others — is the most effective beauty regimen you can ever follow.

So, I hope you find this truth as encouraging - and freeing - as it is to me.

P.S. I’d love to hear what you find beautiful! Perhaps someone you admire (and why!) or what qualities are lovely to you? Please share in the comments below. :)

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Favorite Resources and Recommendations

On My Book Stack: 

Something New:

One of my top reads from 2023 was Living Life Backward: How Ecclesiastes Teaches Us to Live in Light of the End by David Gibson. And please don't get the wrong impression from the title; it is not depressing—quite the opposite. It is a hugely impactful book and one I intend to reread in the years to come. Such a slim volume, with such a gentle voice delivering a powerful message.

Something Old: 

You knew I had to mention this one, didn't you? I've read nearly all of Corrie's books, but this one remains my favorite: The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom. It is a beautiful and stirring story of loss, faith, and love. Real history shared from the heart of a woman who walked through it. It's a story you will literally always remember.

Something from Us:

Someone asked why I have yet to include our books here. I don't have a good answer, so I'll mention our best-known books: 100 Ways to Love Your Husband and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife. You can read them individually or go through them together! Short, practical, and surprisingly effective.

*Caprese Orzo Salad from CATZINTHEKITCHEN.com

In Our Kitchen: 

Our warm weather is finally here (it tends to arrive late here in the PNW), so I've been making lots of salads, both as a side dish and as a main dish. And, as we still have "growing boys" around here, I've found that as long as I throw in some extra protein, they enjoy these lighter meals even more than expected.

So, if you're looking for some new ideas OR a tasty twist on an old favorite, here are some wonderfully delicious recipes to try:

• Caprese Orzo Salad

• Taco Salad

• Greek Salad

• Weeknight Steak Salad

• Italian Chopped Salad

Hospitality In Our Home:

If you’re new here, my husband and I run the Cascades Ranch Guesthouse, a short-term rental, on our property. 

It's officially the busy season for the Guesthouse. We've had back-to-back bookings, which keeps us hopping! We've enjoyed hosting guests from all over—mainly around the U.S. but even as far as Pakistan.

It's especially gratifying for me to host people new to our area—the High Desert, which is primarily cattle ranch country at the foot of the Cascades Mountains. For instance, last night, I looked up to see our delightful guests from Czechoslovakia walking out into the pasture adjacent to our property to take pictures in the sunset. Picturesque to be sure, but we were glad the cattle—particularly the bull only yards away left them alone!

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A Closing Blessing

I pray that you will pursue real beauty, the kind that comes from knowing and walking with God.

May you have eyes to see the incredible worth of yourself and others, no matter the age or appearance.

I hope you feel beautiful, seek wisdom as you grow older, and enjoy and embrace the season of life God has you in without worry for tomorrow.

In His grace,

Lisa Jacobson

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